Day 40 – Q 5.Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution. Elucidate.

5. Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution. Elucidate. 

कोमलता और दया कमजोरी और निराशा के लक्षण नहीं हैं, बल्कि ताकत और संकल्प की अभिव्यक्ति हैं। स्पष्ट करें।

Introduction:

Tenderness is the quality of being sensitive and compassionate. Kindness is the quality of being warmhearted, sympathetic and considerate. Both of them are universally admired and recognised as higher human value. 

Body

Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair

Weaknesses in emotional context refer to not being able to control one’s emotion. It means that ‘self-management’ in the overall discourse of emotional intelligence is weak.

Despair refers to losing all hope. In such a situation one may end to be polite and humble.

However, tenderness and kindness as values are not signs of weakness and despair – 

• Weak and despair cannot be emotionally motivated to understand pain and suffering of others. 
• They cannot develop requisite empathy to manage one’s relationship with others. 
• They won’t be able to diminish the longevity of unpleasant emotions such as anger, frustration or anxiety so that you move through them quickly.
• Weakness and despair lead to problems like road rages, riots, high rate of divorce etc. If people be kind and tender these problems will not arise. 

Tenderness and kindness are manifestations of strength and resolution

Strength and resolution in emotional context refers to having high emotional intelligence and emotional stability.

• Tenderness and kindness required empathy, self-management, and management of one’s relation with others.
• It requires managing one’s disruptive impulses. Being able to diminish the longevity of unpleasant emotions such as anger, frustration or anxiety so that you move through them quickly; Being able to reduce the occasions on which unpleasant emotions occur, so that you experience emotions such as irritation, resentment or helplessness less often.
• It is a job that only strong with high resolution can perform.
• When Gandhiji was thrown out of the train in South Africa. He did not become angry; he never lost his temper. He always treated all foreigners with kindness. He never preached violence against British. He channelized his emotion towards freedom struggle. He was a man with strength and resolution. 
• When Nelson Mandela was released from prison after 27 years, he agreed to work cordially with the whites. He never allowed any rift to develop between different races in in country. His kindness was not sign of weakness but rather this mental strength to forgive and forget. This lead his nation to walk on the path of prosperity and development. 

Conclusion

The strength and resolution to express tenderness and kindness can be developed through development of emotional intelligence.